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Name - Goo Goo Dolls
And even though the moment passed me by
I still can't turn away
'Cause all the dreams you never thought you'd lose
Got tossed along the way
And letters that you never meant to send
Get lost or thrown away
And now we're grown up orphans
That never knew their names
We don't belong to no one
That's a shame
But if you could hide beside me
Maybe for a while
And I won't tell no one your name
And I won't tell 'em your name
Scars are souvenirs you never lose
The past is never far
Did you lose yourself somewhere out there
Did you get to be a star
And don't it make you sad to know that life
Is more than who we are
You grew up way too fast
And now there's nothing to believe
And reruns all become our history
A tired song keeps playing on a tired radio
And I won't tell no one your name
And I won't tell 'em your name
I won't tell 'em your name
Mmm, mmm, mmm
I won't tell 'em your name... Ow!
I think about you all the time
But I don't need the same
It's lonely where you are come back down
And I won't tell 'em your name
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
why is it that a sad song can make me feel all fuzzy inside???
i'll think about that one a lil more.. but in the meantime, lemme rant about the last few days...
thursday: i was super busy on thursday... i woke up at 8. took a shower. ate breakfast (mmmmmm... waffles. yum.) and headed over to St. Agnes to watch my sister's Christmas Pagaent dress rehearsal... i was only there for about 45 minutes though... but boy did those 45 minutes send me back into my past. this year's show was the same as the show we did when i was in the 6th grade except for the "joyful, joyful" song for Sister Act 2 in the beginning.. Rachel had a solo. she opened up the show. well done, lil sis. but yeah... wow. the memories! *sigh* "C-E-L-E-B-R-A-T-E! oh oh oh, we are gonna celebrate, and we will shout hip-hip-hooray, so come along let's not be late for christmas. oh oh oh, it's that happy time of year, when we are full of yuletide cheer, we welcome you from far and near, it's christmas! it's christmas" hehehe.. flashbacks! flashbacks! flashbacks! hehe. it was way cute... i forget what grade sang it, but they were singing the song we sang when i was a 6th grader. *sigh* joe. the year the madness began...
let's go back to my 6th grade christmas experience: the song's a twangy, western christmas song. and in the show we had dancers doing a lil square dance... i got picked to dance with a couple of other students... i think there were 16 of us in all. (8 couples? yeah, that makes sense.) and somehow i got paired up with joe. never did i imagine that he would be my first "boyfriend"... *sigh* it was a crazy time. i was pretty averse to boys. boys=distractions=bad grades. boys=waste of time. boys=bad idea. i just didn't care for hooking up. i remember all the girls getting catty and rather bitchy when it came to the boys in our class, especially when two girls liked the same guy. but that's just how it goes. that's how it'll always go... and so, joe and i got to know eachother real well through dancing together. and then... people started to joke around about him liking me. they even called me "mrs. lucia". yeah... idk about that. but ya know.. when you hear those things enough, you start to build feelings for that person too... and that's what happened. so we'd sit together in class. and i'd hold his jacket and watch while he kicked butt in prison-ball. and send candy grams. and we'd mess around in PE class. it was good fun. those were the days... and then he hooked up with bernice the next year, but we were always pretty tight while they were going out and then she graduated, and then it was open game all over again! hehe! the "joe-phase" did however cause major divisions on the girl front. (ie. ellen and jessica... ooo they HATED! but whatever...) after grad, we didn't see much of eachother except for at confirmation youth group and at a few track meets (that was unexpected). he ended up being one of my 18 roses at my cotillion... good times. good stuff.
yeah.. i wonder how he's doing now at St. Mary's?
*end memory*
so after that, i went to buy tickets to LOTR: Return of the King for me and becky and peter. then becky & i went to carondelet to visit some teachers. we talked to hodges, o'sul, gilbert, okey, & payne. it was nice to see them... i felt really old walking through the halls, but i'm really just 1-4 years older than these girls... idk, whatever. then we headed over to downtown pleasant hill to see the 1:45 movie. we hadn't had lunch so we grabbed some jamba juice. mmmm so good. but sooooo cold! so we stood outside of the theatre for awhile waiting for peter. and in usual peter fashion he got there right as it was starting (i shoulda seen that one coming). becky had already gone in to save us seats, so we grabbed some popcorn and followed. i told her to flash the blue screen on her phone when she saw us come in, and she did! it was cool.... a totally blackened room and all of a sudden a bright blue flash! ahahahaha... the movie was alright. some VERY GOOD moments.. and some VERY GOOD one-liners from our dear legolas. hahahaha... oh orlando... no worries, you're still the prettiest of them all. hehe. yeah... 3 1/2 hours. that's a long time to sit in a movie theatre in a cushiony, yet not all that comfortable seat. the popcorn was ok. it got better when becky and i got to the middle of the bag again (the 2nd butter level). becky's such a girl though... and i guess i was, too, at certain parts... poor peter, sitting with two girly girls, but he should be used to that by now. hahaha... hmmmm.... but, oh, the frustration! (ugh.. let's not go into that right now. i'm not the right place for that)
so after the movie we all went to our cars and becky said something to me. and she was right. but it's sooooooo hard. really hard. and i'm not ready. i'm just not. i've tried--believe me. but... idk. it's not fair. life's not fair. my life is so hard.
later that night, we went to the actual christmas show. talked to some parents who had kids in my class. chatted with sr. james & mr. mcwilliams. chismis-d with auntie marie...
then i went home. unwinded. and spent 2 hours on the phone with lauren. yay for the good 'ol closet convo...
friday: woke up @ 5:30. drove 1 1/2 to Palo Alto (i know i know.. stanfurd... boo!) met up with jennifer from the Asian Pacific Fund and Hans and Craig who were all Banatao Scholars. Then we all proceeded to the Banatao home! WOW!!! they had such a beautiful home. we had breakfast on the veranda w/ mr. & mrs. banatao, & gail & jessica from the Asian Pacific Fund as well as Mark & Christine who were other scholarship recipients. we talked and shared out semester stories. it was very nice. at the end, they were telling us about a summer program where we were exchange college-age students from the philippines and from the US. it sounds way fun! a totally awesome experience, i'm sure. i'm thinking of applying. and also, they're planning a summer retreat at their Vineyards in Sonoma. i'm there!
the rest of the day went by kinda slowly. i got home. had lunch. napped for 2 hours. hooked up my computer (yay!) and did some more bumming around. (note: i need to see lauren sometime before she leaves. we've got "business" to attend to)
today: just got back from the mall. christmas shopping... ack! what a pain. i'm too picky. i still don't know what i'm getting my close friends... done the calendar thing and the mini-book thing. gift cards are too impersonal, but ok. idk... i need help. i'm losing touch with the psychic connection we had going for awhile... hmmm... i'll sleep on it.
oh, and speaking of sleep... DREAMS!
OH
MY
GOD!
i had the best mini-dream last night!!!! wow! i fell asleep around 12 and woke up around 12:30 from it... WOW! definitely NOT G RATED. *sigh* only in my dreams... hehe!
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posted by Rita at 
