| too many thoughts are swirling in my head right now....... |
+ why am i so prone to illness now?
+ why do i feel most free when i dance?
+ why is there so much drama in all these different communities?
+ when will things change?
+ why can't i just graduate already?
+ am i really THAT sad about this being my last year?
+ why does he think i'm always mad?
+ what if i pursued a career in music?
+ what if i kept singing after high school?
+ why can't i seem to motivate myself right now?
+ can i possibly go one month without getting sick?
+ will i ever be able to fit into a size 6 again?
+ why won't she return my calls?
+ what would the judges say if i auditioned for american idol or so you think you can dance?
+ where is all this pressure coming from?
+ why am i becoming such a homebody?
+ why haven't i settled into a routine for the school year yet?
+ when did complacency replace the struggle?
+ where did the peacemaker in me go?
+ am i still living the 4th? |
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| senior year = saving face. |
yep. that's what i said.
i feel like i've let a whole community down.
i feel like any good i try to do will always be shadowed by my mistakes.
i feel like it doesn't really matter what i do now
i just need to save face.
pride rears is ugliness in the fact that i feel like i need to save face
this ugly face
but hey,
it's not about me
and hell,
it's not even about you
it's about community......
*breathe...*
maybe i should just go away?
but like a moth to a flame
i just can't resist it
i love it too much
i love them too much
but, it hurt too much
i got burned too much
did i burn you too?
and you, how is it so easy for you to step away?
we've talked about this.
you are strong.
and i am
not.
changes.
always changes.
welcome the changes.
move
forward
now
with decisions made
it's all for the bettter
it's not about me
and it's not about you
it' all for the community |
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| have i returned to the blogspot community? |
eh? maybe?
so i've had a blog since the beginning of my senior year.
and a xanga since the end of my senior year.
i used to post different things on each.
then i got lazy and duplicated posts b/c i guess the readership was different.
but what i have to say shouldn't matter on who's seeing this?
should it even matter that other people see this?
who do i blog for?
for myself?
or for you?
eh? idk. |
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posted by Rita at 
